Are You Asking the Right Questions?

Are You Asking the Right Questions?

by | Jul 25, 2023 | Care of the Body, Care of the Mind, Emotional Health, Healthy Living, Mindfulness, Personal Growth

 

I was in the library the other day and came across a book entitled “Change Your Questions, Change Your Life”.   It reminded me of another book entitled, “The Secret Code of Success” by Noah St John that I read with a similar theme of considering what questions you ask and how changing the questions you ask can impact your life.

The essence of both books suggests that if you ask negative questions in your inner dialogue, you will get negative answers and negative results.  Here are some examples:

  1. Why am I always in pain?
  2. Why can’t I find a solution to relieve my pain?
  3. Why do I always screw up?
  4. Why doesn’t anyone like me?
  5. What is wrong with me?

You get the idea.  If you ask these question, you will get these kind of answers to those questions:

  1. I am always in pain because I have fibromyalgia.
  2. There is no solution to fibromyalgia, there is no cure, so I will have to live with this for the rest of my life.
  3. The third question will bring to mind all the mistakes you have made.
  4. The fourth question will bring up all the things that you think people don’t like about you.
  5. The Fifth question will bring to mind all the things that you think are wrong with you.

This first list of questions will hold you back in the status quo and work against improving your health.

 

Consider these questions instead:

  1. How can I reduce or remove my pain?
  2. How can I recover from fibromyalgia? Or “How can I rebuild my health? “
  3. What have I accomplished today?
  4. Why do people like me?
  5. What are my best qualities?
  6. What am I grateful for?

 

Noah St John also suggests the following:

  1. Why is it so easy to reduce the pain in my body?
  2. Why is it so easy to heal from fibromyalgia?
  3. Why is it so easy for me to be competent and accomplished?
  4. Why is it so easy for people to love and appreciate myself?
  5. Why is it so easy to be an awesome person?

 

My Experience with this

Years ago, when my fibromyalgia was really bad, I often asked the questions, Why do I hurt so much?  Why can’t I heal myself?    I was working with a wellness coach that suggested that for a full month focus on these statements and questions:

  1. My body is healing.
  2. How is my body healing?
  3. What does my body need to heal?
  4. What can I do to rebuild my health?
  5. Why is it so easy to recover from fibromyalgia?

In the beginning, it felt like a lie.  But for the whole month, I stuck with my phrases even though it felt wrong and untrue.  By the end of the month, I began to believe that I could heal my body and that it was healing.

This was a turning point in my journey with fibromyalgia.  I began seeing and receiving insights and signs and information that led me to truly improving my health.  I had to be open to the insights, signs, and information that I received, and put them into action.  Otherwise, I would not have improved.

 

Can you open your mind to the possibility that you can improve your health?

The medical community has declared that there is no cure for fibromyalgia.  That is true.

But in my experience, there is a lot we can do to improve our health.  I am living proof.  I have changed from being in excruciating pain all the time. And so fatigued, I could barely function.  I hated my life and often wished I could die.  I would lay in my bed in absolute torture with physical, mental and emotional torment.  I hated waking up in the morning because I didn’t want to face another day.

The song, “Sleep is the only Freedom that she Knows” was my theme song.  At least I had a few hours of sleep to get away from the torture that I lived every day.

 

Most of my symptoms are greatly improved and some non-existent.

Some of the symptoms have completely left, like irritable bladder, brain fog, insomnia, restless legs.  Some of the symptoms are mild, like pain and fatigue.

I used to have lots of skin irritation, burning, and itching.  That is mostly gone and only flares up on rare occasions.

Even as I write this, I know that I have forgotten many of the symptoms that were part of my daily experience.  They are even gone from my memory.

 

Yet, I am not completely free from fibromyalgia.

My main symptom now is IBS. When my intestines function properly, I feel great. When they flare up, other symptoms flare up. I experience increased pain, my mind and emotions get more negative, I am fatigued. I am still limited by this. 

The good news is that this is progressively healing as well.  I now understand what flares my IBS up and have an established protocol to heal it.  The healing process has its ups and downs.  But the ups are more frequent and long lasting, and the downs are not as bad, and I know what I need to get them back on track. 

I know it is on its way out and looking forward to that.

 

Play around with some of these ideas that I am sharing with you.

See if they resonate with you.  I wish for you relief from the ongoing fibromyalgia symptoms.

 

May you improve your health and reclaim your life.  ❤Bindu 

The Power of Kindness on You and the World

The Power of Kindness on You and the World

by | Jul 15, 2023 | Care of the Body, Care of the Mind, Expression, Healthy Living, Self Care, Self Love

Our societal norm has become “me first”

The type of society we live in has become known as “me first”. We’re taught early on to look out for ourselves first, and many do that. We’re self-focused, self-possessed and find it difficult to see beyond ourselves at those around us. We often don’t see how our actions affect others.

But our actions do affect others, sometimes in large ways and sometimes in small ways that create a wave of actions. The Butterfly Effect in Chaos Theory states that on tiny event in one area of the globe can have a substantial effect somewhere else. The same is true with small acts of kindness.

Every time kindness is performed it creates a ripple effect.

It spreads from person to person, continuing endlessly. You could say kindness is contagious, like a disease in which the outcome is beautiful.

Kindness keeps us from being short tempered with others when we’re stressed and frustrated. It helps people realize we’re all on the same team.

Jamil Zaki, Professor of Psychology at Stanford University and Director of the Stanford Social Neuroscience Lab conducted a series of studies observing how witnessing kindness inspires kindness, saying it causes it to spread like a virus.

Zaki says, “We find that people imitate not only the particulars of positive actions, but also the spirit underlying them. This implies is that kindness itself is contagious, and that that it can cascade across people, taking on new forms along the way.” 

When we were to look at how important an act of kindness can help someone in need, we realize how it can empower both ourselves and others.

Today, we are bombarded with social media and news media that focuses on the negative interactions that affect us.  It’s seen in the victims of bullying, of abuse, and of those who abuse their power.  Even our entertainment is often riddled with abusive comments and negative actions.

Helping the disabled person who is struggling to gather items out their reach can change the course of their day. By giving a hungry person something to eat or helping a homeless person find shelter can change their outlook on life. Helping an elderly neighbor carry in groceries, mow their yard or just check on them occasionally, can help them feel less lonely. If you say thank you, please, and hello to others who are serving you, you brighten their day.

 

If you perform even the smallest act of kindness, you have the potential to change the course of persons life, even if only for a short period of time.

But kindness not only effects the one you are performing it for. It has a positive effect on you as well.

  • When you are kind to someone, your body gets a surge in serotonin, feel-good endorphins and oxytocin, all hormones that promote a natural high.
  • These hormones reduce pain and lower bread pressure, helping you feel relaxed and loved.
  • The person you are kind to will experience this surge in hormones too. And anyone who witnesses the act of kindness will feel the same feel-good effects.

Kindness fuels curiosity to know each other better. It helps us hear each other without putting up any pretenses. It’s considering other people and what they experience and their concerns and how you can make their lives easier.

 

Kindness is contagious.

It ripples and grows, effecting the unsuspecting and the observing. One act of kindness can change thousands of lives.

In the words of Maya Angelou, “People will forget what you did, they will forget what you said, but they will never forget how you made them feel.”

Simple acts of kindness can contribute to rebuilding our health.

Simple acts of kindness remind us that we have something to offer others and the world.  When we offer kindness to another, we feel that kindness within our own heart, which helps to heal any hurt that we carry within.  The ripple effect not only impacts others, but our own heart. 

 

Contemplation for this week:

Become more aware of the balance of selfishness and kindness in your world.  What brings selfishness into your world?  What brings kindness into your world?  What can you do to tip the balance toward the kindness side?  Remember to include yourself in your acts of kindness!

 

May kindness fill your heart, mind and soul, 💕Bindu

You Are Not Alone!

You Are Not Alone!

by | Jul 1, 2023 | Emotional Health, Healthy Living, Inspiration

You are not alone.

Living with fibromyalgia can be isolating.  It is near impossible for someone without fibromyalgia to understand what we are going though.  Many times, we are blamed or criticized for having to cancel an appointment or get together. Or people think we are lazy if we cannot keep up with the pace of the world around us.  Simple things like doing laundry or cleaning house are a major event and sometimes we just don’t have the energy or strength to do it. 

We feel unseen and unheard.

Doctors often think it is all in our head.  Even if they acknowledge the fibromyalgia, many are clueless about what to do.  They feel helpless. 

We feel discouraged and alone.

 

They don’t understand.  It is impossible.

Some years ago, a friend of mine had spinal meningitis.  He was hospitalized for several days.  Once he was released, he came to visit me.  He told me that he now understood what I was experiencing. 

I finally felt heard and seen.  And was grateful for his understanding.  Yet, I didn’t leave it there.  I asked him to imagine feeling like that for 30 years rather than just a week.  It puts a whole new perspective on living with fibromyalgia.

 

Fibromyalgia wears you down, until nothing is left. Or so it would seem.

I think that fibromyalgia is like the ocean beating upon the coast. It wears down the rocks.  What is left is our true essence.  That is something that nothing can take away from us.

Connection with that inner essence has allowed me to stay whole and connected to something deeper than what I do or don’t do.    Having a connection to my calm inner presence has made my life bearable and worthwhile.  It allows me to get out of bed each day and find things that make my life worthwhile . . . like writing my blogs and inspiring quotes for you.  In that way, I feel connected and not alone.

 

So, thank you for being in my life.

Join me on July 18 for my free workshop entitled:  Connect with your Calm Inner Presence.  to reconnect with your own Inner connection and connect with other men and women needing connection with a group that will understand and hear you.

May you feel connected.  💕Bindu

Click here to register

Coming in September

The Fibromyalgia Matrix

The Fibromyalgia Matrix

by | Mar 9, 2023 | Care of the Body, Care of the Mind, Emotional Health, Expression, Healthy Living, Mindfulness, Self Care, Self Love, Spirituality

When I first learned about fibromyalgia, I was excited . . . and then disappointed.

After 20 years of suffering, there was a name for what was going on with me. I thought that meant that it could be cured. I was sorely disappointed. I found that just because there was a name for what was wrong with me, didn’t mean that anyone knew how to heal it. 

I wanted to be healthy.

So, I pulled up my bootstraps and began applying what I had learned in my explorations of holistic health and consulted with holistic practitioners. By that time, I had given up on medical doctors as they had nothing to offer me that made any significant difference. In pulling it all together, I came to a place where I could manage my symptoms, but not make any real progress on completely eliminating them.  I wanted more. I wanted to be healthy and not live within the limitations of having fibromyalgia. I felt like I was living in a box and had to carefully manage my life to maintain a manageable level of pain and fatigue.  

 

Managing my symptoms wasn’t enough.

My search continued. I slowly began unraveling the underlying causes of my dis-ease.  Piece by piece, I began to resolve physical, mental, emotional, expression and spiritual imbalances that were keeping my stuck, unhappy and sick.   Realizing that there was not one thing that would fix or heal what was wrong with me, I coined the term the Fibromyalgia Matrix. 

 

Fibromyalgia Matrixtm

The Fibromyalgia Matrix is the interweaving and interconnected physical, emotional, mental, energetic and spiritual imbalances that underlies the experience of fibromyalgia. Each person’s matrix is unique to them, just like a fingerprint is unique. The Fibromyalgia Matrix creates chaos physically, emotionally, mentally, energetically. No foundation, no stability, impaired function, chaos, nothing to stand or build on. Sound familiar? 

 

Recovery from fibromyalgia! 

Recovery from fibromyalgia is a process of identifying and resolving these imbalances. It is quite like putting a puzzle together. You find the right pieces and put them together in the right sequence. Out of chaos comes order and improved function. As the pieces of the puzzle are found and put together, symptoms go away, health emerges, and peace is restored.  

Rather than chase symptoms, we find and resolve the underlying imbalances. That is the path to creating true health on all levels. 

 

The 8 fold process 

By moving through the 8-fold process I spoke about last week, we can unravel the Fibromyalgia Matrix, and progressively rebuild our health, reclaim our life, rediscover our joy and align with our purpose.   True health is much more than the elimination of physical symptoms. It is embracing the totality of who we are, body, mind, emotions, energy and spirit with love and compassion and reclaiming our uniqueness and our gifts and living successfully, powerfully and joyfully in the world. 

 

An Introduction to the Integrative Wholeness Experience to the Rescue!

That my friends, is what I am about. Are you ready to join me in this grand adventure? I hope so. That is why I am launching the Introduction to the Integrative Wholeness Experience next month. In this program, we can come together to heal individually and collectively. I’m excited about this. I hope you are too.  

Stay tuned, look for more information about the Integrative Wholeness Experience. 

May you be whole, 💕Bindu 


Coming Soon!  Stay tuned for details.

5 Types of Stress that Cause Dis-ease

5 Types of Stress that Cause Dis-ease

by | Feb 16, 2023 | Care of the Body, Healthy Living

What kinds of stresses cause disease?

Underlying all dis-ease is stress. Identifying a resolving the stress in our life and body is necessary to rebuilding our health. Most stress is that which lies in our subconscious and impacts us on a level below our conscious awareness. Yet, we can bring these things into awareness to resolve and transform our health and our lives.

Here is a brief summary of the top 5 areas of stress.

1. Basic care of the body is essential for improved health. The basic needs of the body includes healthy food, water, exercise and rest. You might be eating “healthy” foods, but it is also important to eat foods needed by your unique body type. Same thing with exercise. It is important to chose exercise that is in harmony with your unique body type and with the limitations of your physical condition.

2.  Our lifestyle choices is another area of consideration. Sometimes the person needs improved communication in home, work and social relationships. The individual might need greater balance between work, home, rest, and play.  Perhaps they need companionship, self-love, or community. Perhaps they have a loss of purpose and focus for their lives.

3.There may be biochemical imbalances happening in the body such as gut dysbiosis, Ph imbalances, hormonal imbalances, adrenal fatigue, etc. In these situations, a skilled practitioner would ask the question, “Why are the biochemical imbalances happening? What is the underlying cause?” Biochemical imbalances are usually secondary to a deeper underlying cause.

4. Trauma, abuse and other negative life experiences can be a major factor in someone’s health. Traumas leave a negative signature or vibration in the body. If that isn’t resolved, it can undermine out health and happiness. Identifying and neutralizing these energy signatures frees us from their influence, enhances our energy and opens the mind and heart to new possibilities.

5. The mindset and emotional balance are a factor in health.  If an individual is angry and resentful, they are compromising their body’s ability to heal itself. If a person is chronically sad and depressed, that will impact their health. Then the question that must be asked is why the individual is angry, resentful, sad or depressed. That often lead us back to trauma, abuse and negative life experiences. It can also be caused by lifestyle and relationship challenges as mentioned above.

These areas are interconnected.

Understanding the underlying matrix between the physical, mental, emotional, spiritual and energetic bodies can be complex. In order rebuild our health, it is important to look at all dimensions, the imbalances in each dimension and the interrelationship between them. We can progressively identify and resolve the imbalances and unweave the Fibromyalgia Matrix™.

An Introduction to the Integrative Wholeness Experience

In the coming month or two, I’ll be launching an online course for women with fibromyalgia. This will be an opportunity for us to come together and support each other in identifying and resolving stress in our lives. Discovering, healing, honoring, sharing and growing together in health and fulfillment as a community.

Stay tuned for more information. I hope you will join us.

Wishing you health and inner peace. 💕Bindu

Acknowledging Positive Changes

Acknowledging Positive Changes

by | Jan 16, 2023 | Care of the Body, Care of the Mind, Healthy Living

Part of rebuilding our health is making different choices.

These choices can include dietary changes, exercise, in how you think, how you feel, the hours you work, making time for self-care and others.  This might feel overwhelming and undoable, but if done in the right way, it is very possible.

Making lifestyle changes is a journey, not an event.

The journey can be fun and easy if we choose to make it that way.  It is not about perfection.  Don’t feel like you have to make all of the changes today or tomorrow.  Taking small steps each week will make the journey easy and you will be amazed at the results you achieve over time.

Let go of the notion that you need to deprive yourself.

Bring your focus to what you can eat and what you can do . . . not what you have to give up.  Implementing changes doesn’t have to be hard work.  It is important to implement healthy choices at a pace that works for you and doesn’t cause undue stress.  

Self acceptance is an important part of the journey.

Changes made from a place of self acceptance are more powerful and longer lasting than changes made from self judgment.  For example, attempting to avoid sweets because you think you are unattractive because you are overweight is different from choosing healthy foods because they make you feel better physically, mentally and emotionally.  Read these statements a few times and notice how you feel inside as you read each one.

  • I am choosing to eat a healthy food because I feel better physically, mentally and emotionally.
  • I am avoiding sweets because I am unattractive and overweight.

Which one will motivate you more?  Which one makes you feel more positive and uplifted?

 

Acknowledge the positive changes you have made and the results of those changes.

Say you have simply chosen to eat a healthy breakfast 2 days a week.  Acknowledge that and also acknowledge how you feel on the days that you eat the healthy breakfast.  Whatever you focus on is what will grow.  By acknowledging the positive change you have made and the positive impact that has on you, it will grow.  Grumbling about what you haven’t done only leads to discouragement and ultimately will sabotage your progress.

Keep your focus on the journey with all the baby steps you are taking along with your ultimate vision of yourself as a happy, healthy fulfilled person and you will achieve your vision.

Use the following introspection to acknowledge the changes you have made:

  1. List all the changes you have made to rebuild your health.
  2. Make a list of the positive changes you have noticed in your health, happiness and wellness.
  3. Make some positive affirmations out of the lists your have just made.
  4. Notice how each affirmation makes you FEEL; only keep the ones that make you feel good.
  5. Write the affirmations on index cards.
  6. Post the index cards where you will see them . . . on your refrigerator . . . your bathroom mirror . . . or another place where you will see them on a regular basis.
  7. Read the affirmation on a regular basis and as you do so, imagine breathing the feeling of the affirmation into your body. 

Use this introspection to bring a positive focus to the areas where you are challenged?

It is also important to notice areas where you are criticizing yourself and diffuse the self criticism.  Otherwise it could subconsciously undermine your progress.

  1. Notice if there are areas where you are criticizing yourself for not doing as well as you think you should be doing. If so, write these down.
  2. Reflect on your expectations and notice if they are realistic or not.
  3. If your expectations are not realistic, feel free to change them:
    • Break down your expectations in this area into baby steps.
    • Set new more realistic goals
  4. Find a way to focus on this area of challenge in a positive way.
  5. If you feel inclined, share with a supportive friend or with this group. 

Ask for support when you need it.  Sometimes we will feel stuck when trying to implement changes.  At those times, ask for assistance in identifying and moving beyond whatever is blocking your progress.  You don’t have to do it alone.  Support is available.