A Major Factor in Insomnia that Nobody Talks About

A Major Factor in Insomnia that Nobody Talks About

A major factor in insomnia is negative cellular memories. They act like a virus in the human body/energy system to steadily disrupt the mechanisms of the body to heal itself. 

Negative Cellular Memories

 I am sure you have been told it is all in your head. I heard that many times in my life. When we hear that, we tend to think that they are saying we should be able to control what is happening to us.  Obviously, that isn’t true, or we wouldn’t have the physical symptoms that torture us every day.

 However, there is a sub-conscious mind and an unconscious mind that does control what we think and do. And that is beyond your control.  Until it is not . . . keep reading!

 In our sub and unconscious mind are stored negative cellular memories. These memories have a negative element to them that is constantly sending a message to your nervous system telling you to stay alert and be prepared to fight or run. When this is going on in your subconscious memory, your body simply cannot relax enough to sleep. And the little sleep you do get isn’t deep and restful.

 What is a negative cellular memory

 We all have negative cellular memories. It is a fact of life. Every experience we have in our lives is imprinted into our cellular memory banks. Positive and negative memories are both stored.

 Negative cellular memories are the memories where you felt afraid, angry, unloved, threatened, ignored, neglected or hurt. We all have them. These memories impact our health when we were not able to resolve them due to the situation we were in.

 For example, you were constantly criticized by a parent.  It was not safe in your household to even stand up to the parent.  You were subjected to further abuse if you spoke back.  No resolution possible.  This is the kind of memory that undermines your self confidence, self love and your health.  It will interfere with your health and happiness until you can neutralize the energy.  

Science is now beginning to prove this.

 In his book, The Biology of Belief, Bruce Lipton, PhD, presents scientific discoveries about the biochemical effects of the brain’s functioning that show that cells of your body are affected by your thoughts.  This doesn’t mean that you have control over this.  Most of the ‘thoughts’ that we ‘think’ are happening beyond our conscious mind and the negative cellular memories are the driving force that keeps those thoughts in place.

 In his book, Love Your Disease, It’s Keeping You Healthy, Dr John Harrison, describes the process by which we internalize messages from our parents, siblings and others in the womb and our early childhood years. These subconscious messages form the basis of our identity and predispose us to illness.

 Even more detailed information is coming out now that indicates that how the individual interprets the experience can create specific symptoms in the body or impact specific areas of our physiology.  German physician, Ryke Geerd Hamer, spent years researching and documenting with great specificity the connection between trauma and physical illness. He calls his finding German New Medicine.  

Bummer! Now what do I do?

 This may seem discouraging or may even seem to condemn you to a life of misery. But that is not the case.  These ‘subconscious memories’ can be healed and resolved.  By healing them and resolving them, you can recapture the essence of who you truly are without the taint of your negative conditioning. When that happens, you can not only ‘heal’ your body, but discover joy and happiness and fulfillment from within. You can reclaim your power back from the events, situations and people who you gave your power to in your childhood out of a need to survive.

 This knowledge gives us the opportunity to explore, heal and resolve the impact our past experience has had on us.  With the proper tools, we can use this information to heal our bodies, our hearts, our emotions and our minds. 

Wow! How do I do that?

 I have studied and worked in this field for 35 years. I am not a doctor or psychiatrist. I have no medical credentials.  I am a woman who suffered from fibromyalgia for many years.  I was one who heard many times, there is nothing wrong with you.  Or it is all in your head.  I know the pain of that.  I know how helpless I felt and how you must feel when you hear that.  I even resisted and fought this line of thinking for many years.

 I was so determined to heal myself, that I made it my life purpose and my life mission.  I searched and explored and learned and experimented.  Over time, I learned to use this information to help me to rebuild my health.

 Several years ago, working with The Healing Codes process discovered by Dr Alex Loyd, changed the trajectory of my life.  For most of my life, I felt like I had a ball and chain attached to my leg.  I felt like I was moving through molasses in doing anything.  Life was just plain hard. And even when I did succeed at anything, it was never sustainable, and I would always find myself right back in the same hole of despair.

 After working with a Healing Codes Coach for about 4 months, I felt a shift.  It was as though someone unlocked the ball and chain and the molasses went away.  The memory that was connected with this was simply the memory of my depressed mother’s energy that I had absorbed from conception through early childhood.  Once that ‘cellular memory’ was neutralized, the cloud of doom that had always hung over my head was clearing.

Insomnia is one of the things that has improved tremendously for me.  I generally have a good nights sleep now and wake up feeling refreshed in the morning.  This is a far cry from tossing and turning all night or waking after two ours of sleep and unable to get back to sleep.  Waking up in the morning feeling like I had been hit by a mac truck.  Wishing I could just die because I didn’t want to face another day of pain and fatigue.  

This put me on a different path to healing from what I had been on.  I understood more clearly the impact of my upbringing and began to focus more on healing my relationship to that.  I found that using the Healing Codes was a powerful component to my recovery program.  Now I blend re scripting my childhood conditioning and healing emotional wounds with giving the body essential care, supporting my body to detox, supporting my body in re-balancing and repairing itself, and expressing my purpose in the world.  Life is getting better all the time. 

 Now, to answer your question . . . . How use this knowledge to rebuild our health.

There are many approaches to resolving cellular memories.  I have discovered that it is most efficient to blend the approaches.  Some work strictly on the cellular memories themselves. Some work on the mind.  Some work on the emotions.  Some work through the body.  I have found that working on the mind, emotions, body and cellular memories together create the quickest and most in-depth results.

The mind holds negative beliefs that we adopted.  The emotional body is filled with trapped and suppressed emotions that we didn’t feel safe enough to experience.  The cellular memories hold the energetic imprint.  The physical body holds the symptoms and sensations of the matrix created by the mind, emotions and energy body.

I have created a free mini-course called “Six Steps to Resolve Hidden Stressors to Enhance your Health” that introduces you to the process.  I would suggest starting with the mini-course and continue reading my blogs to educate yourself about the process.  By practicing the suggestions in the mini-course, you can begin to identify and neutralize cellular memories.

 In some ways it is a simple process, but some find it difficult because the psyche creates a defensive boundary around the ‘wound’ to keep you safe.  That same boundary can make it tricky to access the ‘memory’ to neutralize it.  If you get stuck help is available.

 Honestly, after 30 years of struggling with my health, embracing this focus has helped me to improve my health like nothing else has.  Rather than chasing symptoms and taking volumes of supplement (or drugs) to manage the symptoms, many of my symptoms have disappeared to never return.  Others are improving.  Once upon a time, fibromyalgia had me by the throat.  I felt powerless against it. Now, I feel like I am in the driver’s seat.  I have hope that I can heal fully and completely.

 I sincerely hope, in my heart, that others will join me on this journey.  I am here to support anyone that would like to learn how to apply this to their own lives and reclaim their health.

 So, sign up for my free mini-course and get started today.  Ask for help if you need it!

 From my heart,


5 Stages of Moving Beyond Fibromyalgia

5 Stages of Moving Beyond Fibromyalgia

My goal in life was to move beyond the experience of fibromyalgia.

As I moved through my experience of living with fibromyalgia, with that as my goal, I noticed 5 distinct phases that I went through.  They were, in essence, 5 steps of empowering myself in relationship to fibromyalgia.  These steps are:

  1. Understanding Fibromyalgia
  2. Living with Fibromyalgia
  3. Managing Fibromyalgia
  4. Healing Fibromyalgia
  5. Life beyond Fibromyalgia.

Understanding Fibromyalgia

In the simplest of terms, fibromyalgia is an experience of multiple physical, emotional and cognitive symptoms including (but not exclusive) to widespread pain, heightened and painful response to pressure, fatigue, sleep disturbance, joint stiffness, difficulty swallowing, constipation and irritable bowel syndrome, bladder abnormalities, numbness and tingling, brain fog, depression, and anxiety.  The exact symptoms and severity of symptoms vary from individual to individual.  Fibromyalgia is estimated to affect 2-4% of the population and effects 9 women for every man.  The term “fibromyalgia” literally means “muscle and connective tissue pain”.

There is no cure for fibromyalgia.  Fibromyalgia is not fatal.  My experience is that the symptoms do increase over time if not managed and addressed properly.  Diagnosis can be difficult and even after diagnosis, finding a practitioner that truly understands fibromyalgia is rare.

Treatment for Fibromyalgia

Generally treatment for fibromyalgia is management of symptoms via medications and lifestyle management.  In the holistic arena you will find acupuncture, herbal treatments, “miracle cures”, chiropractic treatments, diet and exercise recommendations galore, and many countless modalities.

Personally I think that rather than focusing on treating or healing fibromyalgia, we need to focus on healing the individual.  I believe that the underlying cause of fibromyalgia can be different for each person so the idea of healing or treating fibromyalgia or the individual symptoms may bring some temporary relief, but do nothing to create permanent or lasting change.  Treating symptoms can also detract the attention from identifying the underlying cause and thereby making real progress.

Living with Fibromyalgia

Living with fibromyalgia is a difficult endeavor.  In my experience, the symptoms can change radically from day to day, leaving me unsure of what I would be capable of accomplishing on any given day.  Fibromyalgia can impact every area of your life including career, family, relationships, hobbies, finances, and self-esteem.

It is difficult if not impossible for someone who does not have fibromyalgia to understand what you are experiencing.  Many times I heard, “it is all in your head”, “everyone experiences pain”, “you’re just too sensitive”, or “just get over it”.  People rarely understood why I couldn’t keep up with everyone else or often had to say, “I am just going to stay home” simply because I needed to rest.  Many times, I would push myself to do more than my body could handle, and end up in extreme pain and miserable.  Truthfully, it took me years of suffering before I understood how to live with fibromyalgia.

Managing Fibromyalgia

Slowly, I began to listen to my body and understand the limitations that it imposed on me.  When I fought the limitations, I suffered.  As I learned to respect my body and the messages it sent me, I began to be able to manage my symptoms so that they were tolerable and that I could maintain a consistent level of functionality.   By listening to my body, I found foods that were more supportive and exercise routines that worked for me.  I discovered how much sleep I needed and what would disturb or enhance my sleep.  I found the kind of regular schedule that would support me in keeping the symptoms at a tolerable level.  I discovered what kinds of activities I could engage in and others that I needed to avoid.  I could tell when my emotions and anxiety were spiraling out of control and learned ways to pull back to take care of myself.  I found tools that helped my body to relax and release pain and tension.

As I listened, I began to hear more.  I became aware of unresolved emotional experiences and how to release them.  I learned to listen to my mind and become aware of the kinds of thoughts I fed to myself and then slowly rescript my inner dialogue.  I learned to how to take care of myself the times that I was severely depressed.  I learned how to take my power back and communicate effectively with other.

I think I have learned more from listening to my body than from any book I have ever read.  Although, the outside information was valuable and if I asked for it, I would receive information that was helpful to me.  I found that most medications did not work for me.

Rebuilding Your Health

Once I accepted the limitations that fibromyalgia imposed on me and learned to manage my experience, I was in a more stable position.  From there I could begin to research and experiment and look for the underlying cause of my symptoms.

I had the belief that I could heal myself and I needed/wanted to do that.  With this approach, I have been able to root out the underlying causes of my fibromyalgia and put myself on the road to healing.  Finding the underlying cause was one step, applying the needed protocols to my life a second step and then re-balancing, detoxing and rebuilding my body was the third step.

Out of my own experiences, I have pulled together the tools and methods that work most effectively as well as an understanding of how to evaluate others as to how to guide and support their exploration.

Life Beyond Fibromyalgia

Fibromyalgia can be an all-encompassing experience.  It can become the center point of our life.  While dealing with fibromyalgia, it can be helpful to remember that it isn’t the whole of our life.  We need to find outlets for ourselves and our expression that bring love, peace and enjoyment into our lives while on the journey to healing.  We also can look beyond the experience of Fibromyalgia and see or envision ourselves whole, healthy and fulfilled.

As a result of having fibromyalgia I explored areas of myself and experiences in my life that have brought me great peace, contentment, empowerment and inner strength.  I am a more whole and complete person as a result of my illness.  I have learned a great deal about human behavior, health, wellness and spirituality.  I have found my own unique voice and each day give way to my authentic self.  This is a result of the inner work that I did along the way.

I am grateful for this and love the person who I have become.  Healing all parts of myself, physical, emotional, mental, expression and spiritual, became the journey.  That journey will continue as I grow and evolve.

Accepting the Unacceptable – Equanimity Pt 2

Accepting the Unacceptable – Equanimity Pt 2

Accepting the Unacceptable.

When I wrote my blog last week, I was reflecting on the power of equanimity.  The story that I shared shifted the way I perceived life, but it did not happen overnight.  I was pretty anchored in victim consciousness, struggling with health issues, career issues . . . . well in essence, my whole life was unraveling.  I had quit my job and was moving from Colorado to Massachusetts to study Macrobiotics.  It was the beginning of my quest for improved health and inner peace.

As I listened to the story of the Farmer and the Old Horse as I drove cross country, I was amazed.   I had never even considered that the things happening in my life that I thought were bad, might not be in the long run.  It took me years and many ups and downs in my life to fully embrace the idea of equanimity.

As I was posting last weeks post, I wondered if people with fibromyalgia could embrace such a concept.  The phrase Accepting the Unacceptable came to mind.  Living with fibromyalgia, is a day to day experience of accepting the unacceptable.  Mostly because there are many days that there is nothing you can do except to surrender to the pain, fatigue and depression that you feel.  And some days, not even that.

How can we Accept the Unacceptable?

And why would we even want to?  Isn’t accepting it just keeping us stuck in it.  Don’t we need to fight it and do everything in our power to find a solution?  To heal, or to reduce the pain, fatigue, depression, IBS, etc, etc, etc.

In my years of struggling with fibromyalgia, I learned a lot.  I spent years resisting and denying what was happening in my body.  I would push beyond what was comfortable, thinking I could move beyond the pain.  In the long run, that only made me feel worse and led me to wishing I could just die, because life was just too painful.  A phrase from the song Wildflower by Skylark would often come to me: sleep is the only freedom that she knows.  This was my life.  Going to bed at night, even with restless sleep was the only freedom from the pain and depression I lived with every day.    Waking up in the morning and having to get out of bed was meeting the pain and fatigue all over again.

Accepting that I couldn’t power my way through this, was a life changer for me.  I had to be honest and realistic with myself.  I had to be honest about what I could and couldn’t do.  I had to listen to my body and stop pushing myself.  Once I did that, I began the healing process.  I began to slow down.  I was able to say no to what I couldn’t accomplish. Both to myself and my family.

This was a major turning point in my life.

Out of this acceptance and listening to my body, I began to be able to manage my symptoms so that they were tolerable, and I could maintain a more consistent level of functionality.  By listening to my body, I found foods that were more supportive and exercise routines that worked for me.  I discovered how much sleep I needed and what would disturb or enhance my sleep.  I found the kind of regular schedule that would support me in keeping the symptoms at a tolerable level.  I discovered what kinds of activities I could engage in and others that I needed to avoid.  I could tell when my emotions and anxiety were spiraling out of control and learned ways to pull back to take care of myself.

By Accepting the Unacceptable, I found myself and was able to shift into healing. 

As the years progressed, I began to understand the gifts that were inherent in my years of suffering.  I really got the truth of the story of the Farmer and the Horse.

I began to understand the positive impact having fibromyalgia had on me.  I began to receive the lessons of awareness, compassion, and truth that I received by living with fibromyalgia.  I began to let go of old conditioning and discover my authentic self.  Having fibromyalgia changed the trajectory of my life . . . many times.  It forced me to heal on many different levels.  It transformed me from a weak, unfulfilled, mean, needy, shallow person, to a strong, fulfilled, empowered, kind, self-sufficient woman.  For that I am grateful.

Weekly contemplation: 

This week take some time to ask yourself where you can allow more acceptance to happen.

  • Can you say no to a family member as you accept the fact that if you join a family event that you will be in pain for a week?
  • Can you say no to yourself as you accept that if you clean the house today you won’t be able to get up and fix breakfast in the morning . . . and need to ask for help?
  • What other examples can you come up with???

These moment by moment choices to accept what is and make choices based on what is, will pave the way to rebuilding your health.    Check out my blog that I will post in two weeks entitled:  The 5 phases of Fibromyalgia which takes the process even further.

Next week I will post the third installment of the Power of Equanimity and offer some tools to begin to develop and nurture the state of equanimity in your consciousness.

In the meantime, please share your insights and experiences as you experiment with Accepting the Unacceptable.

This is who I am . . . or is it?

This is who I am . . . or is it?

Through my life, I have changed my personality many times. Here is an example:   I used to not be a very nice person.  I was mean and drove other people mercilessly.  Then I became too wishy washy and let others push me around. Now, I am finding more balance developing a healthy sense of self where I can be assertive with my own truth without needing to demand that others believe the way that I do.  Certainly there are aspects of me that don’t change, but there are parts of that do change.  Why is this?

Often when I meet with people and work with them, they talk about aspects of their personality that get in their way of achieving their dreams and claim emphatically, “this is who I am.”  And the unspoken belief is that this will never change.  Out of my own experience, I have learned to question this.  Let me explain.

Who am I really? 

At the core of who we are is a loving, creative, joyful, patient, accepting being.  We are at one with life and are powerful creators.  We can have anything that we choose.   The question becomes, “why am I angry, unforgiving, stuck, unhealthy, fearful, worried, etc?  Why do I have difficulty in relationships, improving my health and achieving my dreams and desires?

How did I decide I wasn’t an amazing reflection of the Divine?

I think that the answer is twofold.  First, we are unaware of the impact of our enculturation on us.  In the first 6 years of life, beginning with conception, we are like sponges, just soaking up whatever is in our environment without any filters.  We come into this world open, trusting and innocent.  The problem is that, for most of us, the environment and people in these first six years of our life were not expressing or living their life as a loving, creative, joyful, patient, accepting being.  So, we absorbed their limiting beliefs, negative emotions and undesirable personality traits.  Also, as a result of experiences in our childhood, we developed our own set of beliefs, such as “life is not safe”, “I must work hard to make a living”, and “I have to do it myself.”  And the biggie . . . “I am not ok.”

What does my bio-chemistry have to do with it? 

The second part of the answer has to do with bio-chemistry.  When we eat an unhealthy diet that is not suited to us, our biochemistry gets out of balance.  This can cause many physical and emotional difficulties such as depression, lack of drive and ambition, spaciness, mind fog, and irritability just to name a few.  Changes in diet, and appropriate nutritional support can completely change these things.  For example, when I eat sugar, it is like I am on speed.  I get hyper active and very impulsive.  I don’t sleep well and my digestive system doesn’t function properly.  When I eliminate the sugar, I am a more balanced, patient, grounded person with steady energy and mood.

Awareness Practice

This month, begin to observe yourself.  Look at the patterns in yourself or your life that don’t serve you. Awareness is the first step to change.  Acceptance is the second step.  Willingness to change is the third step.

For the next month, endeavor to become more aware of patterns that are not serving you.  Notice if you can fully accept that part of yourself without judgment.  If, not, practice accepting yourself as you are and letting go of the judgment.  Thirdly, simply create the willingness to change, to accept yourself as you are and the willingness to let go of patterns and beliefs that do not serve your highest dreams and desires.  Notice what unfolds and continue the process of unconditional self-love and acceptance.